It
never failed, when someone got disfellowshipped or left the organization, their
life became shambles. If married, a divorce ensued. If the person had a great
job, the company would lay-off or close. If the person was healthy, they would
get cancer or a serious ailment.
And
you could see it with your own eyes, so you would crawl back into the cave.
But
things are changing. This week I ran into a sister that I hadn’t seen for about
25-28 years. She was a pioneer who made just one
mistake-- with this brother who convinced her to have sex and she felt
so guilty that she went to the body of elders and confessed that same night.
They formed a committee that same night and she got disfellowshipped. She worked
hard to get reinstated. It took her close to 3 years of writing letters,
sitting in the back of the hall, and putting up with everyone ignoring her.
Finally
she got reinstated but it was never the same. The friends treated her with contempt
and would limit their association with her because she gave in to sex.
She
met this young man who was not a JW and started dating him. Immediately when
the sisters found out, they reported her and she was counseled and was reproved
and put on restriction. (Just for dating a non-jw)
I
could tell she was totally depressed. Then she disappeared. Stopped coming to
the hall, changed her phone number and moved to a new address. A few years later
we heard she got married to this young Non-JW. Some of the Elders would say; OOOh
is she going to pay for leaving the truth. We’ll get her when she comes back
crawling.
Well
I saw her at the store this week. Visiting for the holiday. About 25-28 years have passed. It’s still
freaks me out what some 25 years can do to a person. She was a young (20+) year
old girl when I last saw her, and now
she is a (50) year old lady. It turns out that the young man she married went
on to become a doctor, she has 4 children the oldest one in his 20s and almost
done with College. She lives in an area that the JWs don’t like to work in the
door to door because of its affluence. When they do knock on her door she sees
them on her monitor and won’t give them the time of the day.
She
did say something interesting. She said,
“That when they walk away, she wonders about them. How can they be so blind and
not see that they are being manipulated. I can understand young people being
manipulated, but adults!!!”
I was real
curious so I asked her straight out if she knew TTATT?
She replied,
“What’s that”
I started
explaining and she had no idea of 607 BC, no idea of the lawsuits, no idea of
all the new light, she knows zilts, nada, nothing of the Watchtower.
She’s been
busy raising her kids, traveling with her husband to Africa, China, Japan, and
other places just for vacation. She does a lot of interesting things with her
friends, many who are wives of other doctors, lawyers, and entrepreneurs.
While she is
telling me this, I am beginning to see that I have missed out on a lot in life.
I was really trapped like a slave and didn’t realized that great possibilities were
taken away from us when we become one of Jehovah’ Witness. It’s not just about
wasting your time in the door to door, conventions, etc. It’s about stealing your
identity, stealing your potential, stealing people that could have been good
friends of yours that would stick to you through thick or thin. Friends that
would add and not take away from your happiness.
Finally she
tells me, “You know, I really don’t care to know anything about the Watchtower. I don’t care if
they are a cult, I don’t care if they are the true religion, I just don’t care
to know anything about them. I have a great life, I have a great husband, I have
great kids, and I don’t care to know anything or want anything from those
people. And I’ve already warned my kids
about the WT and they promised me they would stay far away from them.
You don’t
have to know TTATT to leave the organization. If you happen to make a good life
for yourself, nothing else will matter. I think that’s the key.
The only bad
thing about this experience is that I can’t relate it to all those JWs that
made her life miserable. They are still thinking;
That’s What Happens When You Leave the Truth.